After the initial terror of being raped, questions start arising in a rape victimʼs mind.
“Have I contracted an STD?”
“Do I press charges?”
“Will I ever heal?”
“Am I pregnant?”
Some victims have to face STDʼs, or at least take a flight of pills at the ER in
attempts to avoid the onslaught to avoid an unwanted disease from their rape.
Some victims battle with the repercussions of ʻdo I press charges?ʼ question for the
rest of their lives. Many find healing from their physical and emotional trauma a life
long journey. And for about 170 to 340 women, according to the Department of
Justice, deal with pregnancies every year as a result of their rape. The Elliot
Institute estimates that 73% of these women choose to give birth to these babies.
But how many of those women who give birth to their babies pressed charges
against the man who raped them? Who would want to
How many of those women got a conviction from their trial? Not many. Rape is the
most underreported crime, and even those rapes that are reported rarely make it to
a jury trial. Putting the issue of pregnancy aside, many women find that pressing
charges is another difficult feat upon their emotional and physical trauma. For some,
it is easier to just deal with the emotional trauma itself, and forget about pressing
charges. For other women, it is difficult to press charges because they waited too
long to have a rape kit done, or the state wonʼt take their case. For other women,
their case went to trial, but the jury couldnʼt reach a verdict, so the trial was just
brushed off. But for the few that become pregnant and choose to have their baby –
an unfortunate legal battle may wait in the wings that they may be unaware of.
Many states give legal rights to the men that raped these women. The reason being
is because there is no record of any wrong. No trial, no pressed charges, no
conviction. You may wonder why a man, who raped a woman, would even want
custody – the answer is power. Acquaintance rapes make up the majority of rape
cases, and in many cases this crime is committed by someone who also exhibits
other violent or possessive tendencies. Gaining custody of a rape victimʼs child is
just another way of the perpetrator issuing his control. Could you imagine the man
that raped you picking up your child for an unsupervised legal parental visit? The
fright, fear, and control are what drive a few men to push for custody rights, even if
the child was conceived in an illegal manner.
In many unfortunate cases the women who originally wanted nothing to do with the
justice system, and just wanted to have their baby in a quiet corner and discuss
nothing more of their situation has suddenly been bombarded with the legal system,
and so has their child.
Under many statesʼ laws custody or visitation rights may not be awarded if a parent
has been found guilty of killing the other parent or another of his children.
But….many laws do not address the issue of rape.
That means that these rape victims who conceived their child through their rapes,
even after pressing criminal charges would have to be murdered by the man who
raped them in order to protect their child.
When your murder becomes your only option in the legal system, it should be
obvious that rape victims need more rights.
